by Jessica Ursell (Campania, Italy)
in bed
cold beads
of sweat
catch me
still in the snare
of my nightmare
back at the home
of my childhood
walking past
the front door
realizing
it wasn’t quite
completely closed
I went to close it
on the other side
they were pushing
screaming, shoving
with such force
struggling
I tried to push back
but they were so many
coming for the Jew
spewing incoherent vitriol
their rhythmic battering
sounded the beat of
of an ancient hate
I tried to scream
for in my dream
my son was in the room
my brother used to have
but like my brother
my son‘s door was closed
with music playing
so he couldn’t hear
my strangled screams
dazed and in disbelief
inhuman strength surging
like those stories
of desperate mothers
lifting cars
off the helpless bodies
of their children
I shoved the door closed
despite the heaving mob
pounding from outside
so hard to click
that little lock closed
in suburban New York
Daughter of an immigrant Jewish mother from the foothills of the Himalayas and a South Bronx born Puerto Rican Jewish father, Jessica Ursell is a veteran JAG officer of the United States Air Force, poet, and public speaker against antisemitism and bigotry. The granddaughter of survivors of the Holocaust, Soviet gulags, and a descendant of a Taíno great-grandma, she understands in her bones what happens when intolerance, indifference, and ignorance take root in society.
Raised by scientist parents, Jessica’s early environment was steeped in an atmosphere where questions were welcomed and asking “why not” was encouraged. Jessica lives with her husband in Southern Italy where she writes essays and poetry addressing the complex interplay between trauma, power, love, loss, and madness.
Her essays, “At the Country Club with Superman,” “Standing Up for the Voiceless: My Fight with Royalty in Anne Frank’s House,” and “What My Zayda Taught Me About Tikkun Olam“ were published by The Jewish Writing Project in July 2022, October 2022, and January 2024 respectively. Jessica‘s poems, “Sedimented Rock” and “Climbing Vesuvius in Stilettos,” were published by Writing In A Woman’s Voice in November 2023 and May 2024. Jessica’s poem, “A Still-Life Collage of Lost Objects,” appears in the February 2024 print issue of Down in the Dirt magazine as well as online (v. 216 Scars Publications). Multiple military audiences, most recently the United States Navy, Sixth Fleet, have heard Jessica speak about the importance of never being a bystander to evil which she believes is the fundamental lesson of the Holocaust.
The Jewish Writing Project 