Tag Archives: gift of memory

The Miter Box

by Ron Linden (Pittsburgh, PA)

“May their memory be for a blessing.” This Jewish invocation is pronounced when a loved one passes. It serves to comfort and remind us that the departed will continue to bless us with their presence as we remember who they were and what they did. Sometimes, such a blessing can take an odd form. Like that of a miter box.

A miter box-and-saw is a simple yet frustrating contraption that allows the user to cut wood or metal at a precise angle. Usually this is done to let the pieces fit together; for example, in the ceiling molding whose ends must be cut at the proper angles so the pieces can blend at the corners. A miter box-and-saw makes that possible.

In theory.

In practice, it takes the ability to conceptualize how the pieces fit together and even more important, the ability to handle the saw, the box and the wood simultaneously.  Of all the Jewish males in the world, an estimated 75% think they can do it. But a long concealed yet scientifically scrupulous test of the Jewish men in my family showed that exactly one could do so: my brother-in-law Jules.

Jules was one-of-a-kind. He was the first “married-in” to join our family when he wed my sister.  He embodied all the best qualities you would want in a new sibling—good humor, caring, respect, and understanding when his make-out sessions with my sister were interrupted by one of us.  He was extraordinarily and spontaneously generous with his possessions, his time, and his skills. The miter box proves it.

Some years ago our family moved to Pittsburgh and, like many in the city, bought an old house.  Windows, roofing, plumbing, kitchen–all needed attention. As a plumber and carpenter, I was more of a college professor. Jules, however, was a stereotype buster. He was a Jewish guy who knew which end of the hammer to use.  He was the Sandy Koufax of home repair.

But his skills are only part of the story. He and my sister visited us often in Pittsburgh and whenever they came, Jules fixed or built things in our house. He could do this and—to be honest—was a guest who could not sit still and be “entertained.” He had to do things while he visited and our old house provided a rich playground. Knowing this, he always brought the tools he would need—including a miter box.

Jules not only brought the miter box-and-saw to cut the molding strips, but he actually used it correctly without littering the basement with “first drafts.”  He was a one-person episode of “This Old House,” but that was only part of the story . Upon leaving, Jules would typically give us many of the tools he brought with him (probably hopeful of my potential). One of these was the miter box.  

Over the years it lay mysterious and unused as a tool.  But it glowed as a symbol of both my brother-in-law’s multifaceted talents and his expansive generosity. Now, more than a decade after his passing, when I see that miter box I feel the power of Jules’ energy, re-experience his nature, and see the many things he did with us and for our family. This curious contraption, this miter box, is a physical symbol of his generous spirit. In other words, it is–and remains–a memory and a blessing to those left behind.

Ronald H. Linden is professor emeritus of political science at the University of Pittsburgh, where he directed the Center for European Studies and the Center for Russian and East European Studies. He served as Director of Research for Radio Free Europe in Munich, Germany during the extraordinary changes ending the Cold War in Europe. In addition to his scholarly publications and international commentary (see his professional profile here) Ron has authored essays on The Night The Berlin Wall Came Down,”Changing the rules — in life as in baseball”; “Finding Boba Fett: The Pandemic Leaves a Gift,” “The New Pogroms.”

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Something about the rugelach

by Carol Coven Grannick (Evanston, IL)

Something about the rugelach…

they bring her to mind 

the word rolling out like pastry dough

spreading smooth and silky, caressed then cut

they bring her to mind 

as part of the duet with Dad during nighttime travel

dark-lit stars, Yiddish lullabies in the language of then 

the word rolling out like pastry dough

with tastes of comfort and warmth and now

tenderness of hugs still desired this long time later

spreading smooth and silky, caressed then cut

fondled, filled and curled with tenderness then baked

now infusing my mind with the delicate aroma of my mother’s memory.

Carol Coven Grannick is a poet and children’s author whose award-winning novel in verse, Reeni’s Turn, debuted in 2020. Her poetry for adults and children appears/is forthcoming in numerous print and online magazines, and she has received two Illinois Arts Council grants and a Ragdale Foundation Residency for her work.

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Yahrzeit: Remembering the Love

by Joel Rudinger (Huron, OH)

“May the memory of our dear one be for a blessing.”

On the evening of the anniversary of my mother’s death,
I light a match and touch it to the wick
and the Yahrzeit candle catches fire.
My wife and I recite a blessing while its flame burns brightly in
its tiny glass.
For twenty-four hours, her light will kindle memories.

Each time I pass the flame, I say, “Hi, Mom,”
and when I switch off all the lights to go to bed,
the fire of her candle flickers like a happy angel in the darkened room.
“Good night, Mom,” I say and climb the stairs.
Her silence comforts me and I know
when I come down for coffee in the morning
her silent light will still be burning.

I remember
when I was four she stared at me in panic
when a neighbor carried me home draped in his arms,
blood dripping from my forehead
after I had fallen on the upturned barbs of a chain-link fence,
how she softly took me from him,
my bleeding face dazed and whimpering on her shoulder,
her housedress turning liquid red.

I remember
when she took me trick-or-treating on Halloween evenings,
shivering on the sidewalk as her little ghost collected candy door-to-door
and the dark December nights when she held my hand
and walked with me in silence down the street
to wonder wide-eyed at the colored lights of other peoples’ Christmas trees.

I remember
her fragrant juicy apple pies with the lattice crust that
perfumed the house,
the tapioca pudding we made together for dessert,
her Sunday chicken soup that brought our family together
at the dinner table,
when she gave the blessing over the Sabbath candles on Friday nights,
closing, covering, her eyes in prayer.

I remember
her leaving afternoons to give her program “Dolls for Democracy”
in churches, synagogues, libraries and schools, holding high her little dolls,
talking about people of different faiths and cultures down through history,
what they stood for, what they believed, how they worshipped differently,
how everyone could live together in a post-war world.

I remember
when she talked my father into buying a piano we couldn’t afford
and gave me lessons.
She took me to symphonies and concerts at the Toledo Museum of Art,
to the Nutcracker ballet every year at Christmas time,
and on summer Saturdays we’d walk the marble halls of the museum
looking at old masters: Picasso, DaVinci, Brancusi, Moore.

One day at the zoo, she tossed a shiny apple to a young gorilla
who leaped to the top of his cage and whipped it down at her.
It hit her in the head and crushed and stained her new white hat.
“I’ll never do that again,” she said, as I ran off laughing.

I remember
being sunburned to blisters on the beach at Cedar Point,
how she soothed my body with Vaseline to stop the pain.
When I was in high school, she tried to teach me how to drive
as I steered my father’s car into an iron cemetery gate.
She glowed when we shared our first beer together when I was in college.
“You are now a man,” she said. “How about another?”

I remember
how she embraced my decision to leave home to go to school,
to leave home after college to try a new life in wild Alaska.
She always let me find my own way, accepted my failures without judgment,
accepted my judgments without failure.
She embraced my wife and called her a sister and a friend;
she helped me care for my daughters when they were ill.

I remember
her weekly games of mahjong and bridge with friends,
how she collected ivory Chinese figurines and displayed them
on a little shelf,
her anger when my father died,
her battles with cancer and loneliness,
then the sudden stroke that left her without voice
and frozen in her tired body till she willed herself to die.

“Good morning, Mom,” I say when I’ve come downstairs.
Her candle’s burning low but still gives out some heat.
I go into the kitchen to make the coffee.

Each year I never see her light go out
as if she wants to leave in privacy.
I visualize a sudden poof and stream of smoke and then
the candle’s glass is empty of its wax.

Next year, we will repeat the ritual.
The Yahrzeit candle will be lit.
For twenty-four hours,
her flame will bring her back to us with memories.

Joel Rudinger, currently a Bowling Green State University Professor emeritus and Poet Laureate of Huron, OH, is a graduate of the University of Alaska, the University of Iowa’s Writer’s Workshop, and Bowling Green State University. He has published numerous poems and stories in magazines such as the New York Quarterly, Colorado Review, Cornfield Review, The Heartlands Today, The Plough: North Coast Review, and New Waves.

This poem is reprinted from Symphonia Judaica (Bottom Dog Press/Bird Dog Publishing) with permission of the author and publisher. For more information about Joel Rudinger’s work, visit Bottom Dog Press at http://smithdocs.net

 

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